I'm starting to believe that my old car was cursed

It all starts to fal into place - ever since I got that wretched car, one bad thing happened after another..

Losing the people I love, making hasty and careless decisions, falling, and not having the strength to get back up on my feet

It was a trying time for me - and for a long time, I just wanted to just exist.

Didn't matter then, that I was unhappy. Didn't matter that I wasn't doing the things I wanted to. Didn't matter that I knew I could have been so much more than what I was. I hated the fact that I was so weak, and I hated even more, the fact that I was trying to ignore my self loathing.

All that time, it just felt easier to sit back on this crazy rollercoaster ride called life, instead of trying to fight it.

Disappointingly, I just gave up.

Somehow, after I switched cars. Things changed. Call me superstitious, but I really believe so.

Now I'm back behind the wheel. Yes - life is still a maze and I will never figure it out (but hey. who ever does), and I embrace everyday as it approaches with open arms . For once in a long long time, I'm finally truly happy and at peace.

Maybe I'm just a drama queen. As the jellybelly says - its my innate craving for drama that makes my temper so foul.

boo.

Anyways. I don't care. I'm happy now.

Spending the weekend - making crappy breakfast. Frolicking around in my defective jacuzzi. Watching discovery channel all day long. Swimming lessons for the girls in my lil jacuzzi. Car rides with the top down.

I'm very contented.